Running Away from Home - 4th Sunday of Lent, Year C

The Return of the Prodigal Son, Rembrandt

Readings: http://usccb.org/bible/readings/033119-yearc.cfm 

Audio at bottom of post.

Have you ever had a time in your life when you wanted to run away from home?  It’s interesting how so many kids have these sorts of thoughts – they see the privileges that other kids seem to have, they’re told no by their parents, and then they imagine that life must be better elsewhere.  It doesn’t help that there’s so many movies or cartoons that seem to glorify independence as a child, which makes many children think that they can do the same.  I know I had those thoughts occasionally as a child.  Of course, those thoughts are completely irrational, but that doesn’t stop us from wanting to do it!

But what happens when that continues into older age?  This is the question that Jesus proposes for us in our Gospel, this well-known story of the Prodigal Son.  The younger son has had enough of life working with his family, and he comes up with the grand plan – “I’m going to claim my part of the inheritance and go have grand adventures and a lot of fun!”  Now there’s something natural about this desire for independence, but the stakes here are high; the son is essentially saying to his father, “You’re as good as dead to me.”  Isn’t it a bit crazy that the father just simply lets his happen?   I can imagine his sorrow, but he respects his son’s free decisions and lets him go.  The son has this thought - life away from home must be better than here – and he’s willing to leave his father and his identity as son behind.  His activities aren’t good either – drunkenness, partying, swallowing up the property with prostitutes, and working among pigs, which the Jewish people considered to be ritually unclean and would have been a tremendous insult to his heritage and faith. 

This is a parable, a story that Jesus tells in order to tell us something about our relationship with God.  I think this is our unfortunate tendency as fallen human beings: we’re going to be tempted to think that life is better elsewhere than in our Father’s home.  These past few weeks in Lent, we’ve been reflecting on the road to reconciliation, first seeing how much grime there is in our lives, then last week reflecting on the grit necessary to clean it up.  Any time we sin, we’re running away from our Father and forgetting our identity as sons and daughters.  This can happen in small ways, such as the thoughts we have or the words we say to others, but it can also happen in pretty big ways, by our actions that harm others or ourselves.  And we can’t forget about the older son in the story, who is just as lost as the younger son because even though he has remained home, he has lived more like a servant than a son and is spiteful of his brother’s return.  For those of us who have been faithful, do we ever become judgmental of others or resentful that they’re receiving the same mercy we are? 

But here’s the surprise of the story: the younger son thinks that he will just go back home and be recognized as a servant.  When he comes back, the father is waiting for him, rushing toward him, embracing him with all of his love.  He doesn’t even give the younger son a chance to confess all of his sins – he simply wants to clothe his son in his true dignity and joy.  The reality is that every time we come back to God asking for His mercy, He is so glad to give it.  Have you ever experienced that?

I remember a few summers ago I was doing an eight-day retreat, which consisted of a few hours of prayer each day and meeting with a spiritual director, who was a priest from Minnesota.  The first few days of the retreat, I was really recognizing the grime in my life.  Memories from my past were coming back to haunt me, I recognized my own doubts and anxieties about my faith and vocation, and I recognized the lies that were present on my heart – I’m not good enough, there’s something wrong with me, I’m not able to be loved.  It was hard to bring this up to my spiritual director, but instead of judging me, Fr. Jon showed me the Lord’s mercy and presence, and he reminded me of this Gospel story.  More than that, he showed me how to pray against these memories and lies, to say in prayer, “In the name of Jesus, I renounce these lies, these anxieties, these fears,” because we’re all plagued with these small attacks from Satan, who tries putting these small thoughts and fears into our hearts to keep us from running to our Father.  That time of prayer was very liberating for me, renouncing those things that were in the way of being at home with God, and I remember remarking to my spiritual director after that prayer, “It feels like all that’s left is my sonship.” 

No matter where we are in life, I think we all have areas where we want to come back to the Father even more.  The great thing is that God’s grace is already preparing us to receive this mercy, that He has run forward to meet us.  I recently read The Return of the Prodigal Son by Henri Nouwen, a book that beautifully reflects on this topic.  Here’s what Fr. Nouwen wrote: “For most of my life I have struggled to find God, to know God, to love God.  I have tried hard to follow the guidelines of the spiritual life.  I have failed many times but always tried again, even when I was close to despair.  Now I wonder whether I have sufficiently realized that during all this time God has been trying to find me, to know me, and to love me.  The question is not ‘How am I to love God?’ but ‘How am I to let myself be loved by Him?’  God is looking into the distance for me, trying to find me, and longing to bring me home.  God is the father who watches and waits for his children, runs out to meet them, embraces them, pleads with them, begs and urges them to come home.” (pg. 106 in 1992 Doubleday edition) 

Once we come back home, we become renewed in our lives as sons and daughters of God.   Then we can become like the father in the parable, filled with compassion and desiring to share God’s grace of forgiveness and mercy with those we know.  Many of us know how difficult it is to know someone who has become far from God – it can be a source of great sorrow.  We wonder, “What can we possibly do to bring them back?”  Even here, we trust in the Lord’s mercy and pray that we may show the same compassion to others that God continually shows to us, knowing that His grace is powerful at all times.

Right now, at this Mass, is our opportunity to receive this mercy and compassion.  Consider: “What area of my life am I most tempted to run away from the Lord?”  Then offer this upon the altar and allow the Father to embrace you right here.  I’d also encourage you: if there’s something really heavy on your heart that’s keeping you from God, then the sacrament of confession is a powerful place to receive God’s incredible mercy.  I’d like to close with the prayer that Fr. Jon gave me to pray with related to this Gospel passage: “Abba Father, all my need for love and affection is found within Your embrace.  May I never leave my home in You again, but only remain in Your shelter and abide in Your shade, where You restore to me the joy of Your salvation!”